


Gentle

by dirkygoodness



Category: X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Also it's not porn, Angst, Basically just Erik being angsty because he doesn't know how to handle emotions, Charles just wants to kiss him, Fluff, Healthy relationship?, I think not, Just mentions sex so, M/M, Not quite sure what's going on here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-21
Updated: 2015-01-21
Packaged: 2018-03-08 08:40:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3202835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dirkygoodness/pseuds/dirkygoodness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Erik hadn't expected him to taste like that. He also hadn't expected his lips to be so soft.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gentle

**Author's Note:**

> Not quite sure what this was supposed to be but it turned out much different than I had expected.  
> I've been working on this little shit for about two weeks now and I finally got it finished enough to post.  
> Sorry for inconveniences, misspellings, and any other mistakes I tried to fix as much as I could.

The first thing Erik thought was that he tasted like tea. Which was odd, he'd not seen the other drink any that day - hell, not even that week. Could it be he just tasted like tea naturally from drinking it for so many years, or did he just drink it when Erik wasn't looking? Both of which seemed plausible. Just as it was that Charles, lovely Charles, was as sweet tasting as he acted. And that's not to say he couldn't be firm - more like his first instinct was sweetness. To be gentle.  
  
That's exactly what he tasted like, sweet things. Mostly cherries. Erik hadn't expected him to taste like that. He also hadn't expected his lips to be so soft. Erik's own were chapped and splitting, not anywhere gentle or kind. But Charles' lips - they were like kissing water. Soft and gentle and fit in perfectly with his own. Like having nothing but pristine, smooth edges trying to fit with your own ragged, ripped apart and sharp self - then suddenly one of them fit and didn't change your edges, just matched them. And that was so shocking to him that Erik, for a moment, forgot how to breath. He forgot how to do anything, how to function. It felt so right to finally have something -  _someone_  - not force him to work with them. He felt relieved, and he didn't know why because he never did.   
  
And it was stupid, completely and utterly stupid, because it was just a kiss. It wasn't like Charles had confessed his love to him or something. He didn't even know how the other felt, didn't know if this was drunken fuckery or sexual frustration or  _what_  it was. For all Erik knew Charles could be using him as a tool - something to vent his anger or frustration. It wasn't like he wasn't used like that before - or used others like that. No, Charles was too kind to do something like that. Or was he? From his talks with Raven, Charles was quite the player - flirting and fucking women. One night stands, nothing long term. Just pent up frustration. This might just be frustration - most likely was, who'd want to love a scarred up monster like himself?  
  
But Erik would still go along with it. Because the feeling, whatever it was that he was feeling now, was intoxicating. It was like a drug, something deadly that would kill him in the end - but he couldn't stop because now that he felt it, tasted it, he couldn't live without it. Erik knew what drugs did to people, knew that it took over their minds and every waking thought. And he knew how bad it was to withdraw from a drug - even just the first try.   
  
So he couldn't stop himself as he pressed farther into Charles, flush against his body and his hands tangling in his clothes and hair. Charles and his tongues mingled and he almost purred as he drank in a soft groan that slipped past Charles mouth. The smaller man reacted much like Erik had expected, this prompting him to continue. He tipped his head upwards and forcing Charles own face back slightly, granting him more access of his mouth. It also gave him the advantage - the upper ground. That was something that he'd keep were they to do this. He wasn't about to simply be controlled like men paid hundreds for, nor would he really force anything. He was, in fact, the one who had wanted something other than just this.  
  
But that didn't last, Charles pulling away from him gently, a hand on his shoulder to stop him. Erik raised an eyebrow because wasn't this just sex? Charles just wanting to get this out of his system before he tried it with someone else. Erik was there, he was easy. Accessible. And as much as he wanted to say he wouldn't, no matter what he did if Charles asked him to he'd sleep with him. Hell, he'd kill for him. Had. 

  
"My friend." Charles said quietly. Sweetly. Erik couldn't get over the cherries, the tea. Couldn't get over his mouth -  _him_. "Oh, my friend. I don't intend to use you."  
  
Erik froze, leaning back slightly. Wasn't - wasn't that what this was? Or was it really that Charles was drunk? Erik was sure he would have smelled - fuck, even tasted - any alcohol. He couldn't breath, he couldn't do anything. Couldn't even talk. Was  _he_  drunk? Was this all a dream? His thoughts were cut off sharply with a voice suddenly in his mind. Gentle, calm. Barely there, more like a suggestion or feeling instead of an actual presence. 

  
_Breath. In and out, breath. Calm down. It's alright. Everything is fine. Breath.  
  
  
_ Erik sucked in air so fast he was left coughing, turning his head away so as not to cough on Charles. All the while a soft hand - Charles' hand - was a slight but constant pressure on his shoulder. When he could look at the smaller man once again he was giving him a look of - was that pity? Amusement, perhaps. Was this funny? For once, Erik couldn't decipher what Charles thought - wasn't that funny? He wasn't even the one with telepathy but he realized now that he almost always knew what the other was thinking. From facial expressions to actions, he could almost always tell what he was about to do or say. Now though, he was clueless.  
  
"Erik, I'm not using you. I feel something for you beyond sexual frustration or whatever a drink addled mind would make me feel. I kissed you not because I want nothing more that the occasional... screw." Erik blinked as he noticed that Charles' face was dusted with a light red color- he was blushing. Why was he-? "I have  _romantic_  feelings for you. Non sexual, romantic feelings. I mean, yes there is that too, but it's not  _just that_. I want to be with you."   
  
Erik was quiet for a moment, simply staring at the other. Taking in what he'd said. So this - this wasn't something of simply sexual gain? Charles had feelings for him? Romantic feelings? That was.... that was new. Very new. He'd never had someone feel that way towards him. No, he had. He just didn't think he had them  _back_. He never liked the pretty blond girls and boys, the tall brown haired teachers or the red haired whores. They might have loved him, but he felt nothing but gain for himself. Something that worked in his favor - something non emotional. He always kept his emotions and sex appart. He'd kept most emotions, beside anger, out of his life for a very long time. He wasn't quite sure how to process them, now that they had come back.   
  
Yet instead of saying his fears, his questions, he smirked slightly - his default face when it came to attempting to lighten a tense or uncomfortable situation. "I thought you said you'd stay out of my mind?" He almost grimaced at his voice, rough and thick. It sounded strange and foreign, untamed and wild. Almost frightening. And he was, he was frightening. Erik was the kind of guy that made you take steps away, forcing you to walk off the sidewalk. Erik should scare even the most calm and collected, the bravest of men. Fuck, he had. He did. So why? Why would Charles, of all people, want to poke the beast?  
  
Charles smiled slightly and Erik swore he felt something inside him falter. Sway farther into belief that maybe, just once, there was someone who liked him for - well him. Not his fake face. Not the masks or people he conjured up to get information. Not his mutation, trying to use it to their own good. "It was hard not to hear. You're very loud."  
  
Erik nodded slightly, dropping his hands away from Charles completely. He wasn't actually surprised that Charles could hear his thoughts now. The man had told him that when someone was anxious, scared, nervous, or angry their mind became more active - more strong. It was hard for him not to listen when that happened. At least that's what he'd said. And it wasn't like he didn't believe Charles. In fact, he wanted to more than anything. It just didn't seem smart - thinking so highly of someone like himself. He was no saint. He was a disease, terrible and deadly, striking down those who didn't even know he was there. And Erik, no matter how much he wished, didn't think that one man - no matter how good - could be the cure all to him. He'd still have his problems, still believe what he did. It wasn't like it would change overnight.  
  
There was no way someone could want him the way he was - and he wasn't going to become instantly better. The few who had fallen for him had been naive, immature, and idiotic people to unaware to realize that he would likely kill them one day. Or someone close to them. He just couldn't accept that Charles was willing to take him like this.  
  
"You don't know what you're doing, Charles." Erik warned. His eyes scanned the others face, looking for something that might tell him that Charles wasn't stupid enough to do this. And yet he found nothing - though he hadn't thought he would. He sighed as he stepped back, aiming to move away. Charles threw his hand out, grabbing him by the bicep.   
  
"I'm not stupid, Erik, I can make my own choices." Erik scoffed, rolling his eyes in the smaller mans direction but never looking directly at his face.   
  
"No you don't. You know _nothing_  if you are stupid enough to want this."  
  
"Oh? And how so? Please, Erik," Charles said, his teeth gritting together in his - frustration? Erik couldn't decipher the mix of emotions on his face. "enlighten me. If I'm so stupid, then tell me why I can't want this. Want  _you_."   
  
"I am not  _safe_. I am not good for anyone. If you go down this road it will end badly - and not for me. It will leave you in ruin." He shook his arm, dislodging Charles' hand from him. "I don't - I don't know  _how_ to give you what you want, Charles. I've never felt that way for anyone." Charles looked at him with pleading eyes, his hand - the one Erik threw from his body - laying gently on the others chest. Erik's breath hitched.   
  
"Yes you have, Erik. You have felt love." Charles bit his lip as Erik's head whipped around, looking at him in disbelief. "Love. Everyone feels it. You have felt it. I've felt it in you, in your mind, Erik. And I think I can decide for myself whether you are safe enough for me - or not. I am not afraid of you."  
  
"You should be, Charles. You-" He laughed slightly at the amusement to it all. He'd spent all this time trying to make sure everyone feared him, and the one person who could actually cause some damage to himself, some harm, he failed to keep them in fear. Hell, Erik doubted that Charles had ever truly feared him. He'd failed when it had really mattered, and yet he couldn't bring himself to really care. He felt more for Charles, amazing, naive, idealistic Charles, than he had for anyone in his life. And that scared him, because for years emotions other than anger were not assets - but liabilities. They made him weak. Didn't they?  
  
"Please, Erik." Oh, this just wasn't  _fair_. He was powerless to do anything but listen, to give in to whatever Charles wanted. Erik had no fight in him anymore - hadn't really when it came to this kind of thing.   
  
"This will end badly." Erik said finally. Charles smiled gently - always gentle - grabbing onto the taller mans shirt and pulling him forwards.   
  
"Some things you have to do even if you think it's not right." And with that, Erik was pulled down, Charles pressing his lips upon the others softly. Erik felt every last bit of fight fall out of him, dissipating as he pressed his lips back onto Charles, sighing gently. Erik realized, even from the beginning, there was almost no way that there would have been another outcome but this. When it came to Charles, there was nothing - nothing at all - that he could do. 


End file.
